Learn to be a Great Coach Manager

Manager has short goal to attain and coach job seems to be a slow, long-term process, even we know coach skills can help manager to grow his team and do better team collaboration. How can manager play a good coach and achieve his short goal efficiently?

Coaching process can be Solution-focused and effective as well to match the fast pace managers are dealing with everyday. Before we start the journey, 2 mindsets have to be changed for managers:
1. Coachee himself is the best expert to solve his problem.
Everyone has his own "tips" which is most effective for himself.
2. Less talking.
Both are difficult and that's why we need to learn and practice.

WAIT...Not the way your way

You're a well-experienced manager, had seen same kind of situation thousand times, and you know right away what action should be taken. Isn't this the value of manager to resolve problem that your staff cannot do?
The time is changed; the economy, environment and lots of things are also changed when time moves on. Your glory past and successful experience might not work out perfectly as before. But we just cannot help to instruct and command, which seems the most efficient way. If you can transform your experience into "smart questions" to stimulate your staffs, then you will save lots of great ideas you are not even aware of.
This part is really hard for Managers. One tip I learnt from my career coach Miss Paulina Chu that she kept reminding herself while doing coach with "WAIT" - "Why Am I Talking?". So coachee can be stimulated to talk and think through the whole issue the same time; then he will find his own way out that you don't bother to persuade. You need to learn how to coach and one book you may refer to is "Brief Coaching for Lasting Solutions" by Insoo Kim Berg , in which the author uses many office case studies to demonstrate how to coach effectively.

Even a Super Sales need to be Coached
We all know what to do. A good coach keeps reminding you to do what needs to be done.

Sales are all well trained on how to win by doing account plan or project plan, but very few can always follow the bible along the selling cycle. It happens all the time, especially while the sales is so engaged in the project, and even forget his "winning strategy". Sales Manager plays a key role here to coach his sales with some simple basic questions, for example:

"What makes you believe the other person(i.e. your contact window's boss, the Owner, the Board...etc) is not the decision maker?"

I'd dealt with many channel conflict issues that different channel sales actually thought their contact window is the key person, but most of time, one channel covers the project manager, the other channel covers the GM, while a new comer has relationship with the board director who jumps out the last minute to turn all final decision.

"How do they proceed their purchasing procedure?"

Under many circumstances, after Sales offered his bottom line quotation to the decision maker, then he found out their Procurement dept needs to cut 5% more as normal practice; or sales are stunned that customer needs to post for open bid.

"What will be your competitor's winning strategy? what makes you think you can win?"

Many put together their winning strategy based on their own wishful thinking, and it became vulnerable while simulating competitor's winning strategy. In many occasions, we lost project due to "unexpected" reasons, those reasons might be minimized or eliminated if we thought of being in the position of competitors.

Above example questions are all sales 101. Good coach knows what question to ask in right occasion to help super sales to avoid his blind spots.

Coach Skills
To help you do your manager job easier

"Why did you make this mistake?" - You want to know his thinking logic behind to prevent from happening again next time.

"You didn't achieve your goal, why is that? - You want to know the problem to help.

"You mentioned you'd done your best but the economy is just bad...How come others can achieve their goal instead of you?" - You want him to know there must be something missing in his "best-effort", and you want to help.

I'd also seen a fighting between field Country Manager and HeadQter VP in office with loud emotional words followed by door slam. The Country Manager just felt this VP kept picking him up during the review meeting. When gone into emotionality, nothing will be accomplished or improved.

When you are so eager to help, you might make your staffs become defensive. Can we all do them a little bit better?

"Why does it matter?"

In the book of "Leading with questions" by Michael Marquardt, he encouraged managers to keep asking why, and usually the solution are in those questions, but he also mentioned you must be very careful while asking "why" because it usually makes people uncomfortable.

When dealing with business problems, we should dig out the root causes, but while it involved with personal, "why" question usually close the communication door. If we can simply change the question "Why do you lose the deal?" (Your staffs might hear the question between the lines - "are you nuts?"), to "How come you lose the deal? Please help me to understand." ("I believe you're good; there might be something wrong; Let's work it out together..")

What does matter is "How to make things better?". Your discussion should focus on solution. Your staff might did something dumb. Do not dig into this psychology why, 'cause it won't help your conversation. We don't play as a psychic or shrink.

"What did you do well before? and is it helpful to keep doing it?" to empower what coachee is familiar with and good at.

"Since current method didn't work out, alternatively, what can we do differently?"

Most important, "State your expectation(objective) clearly and make it small." so you can see the progress one at a time, but not something like "over-achieve your goal.", which you don't have actions to trace and improve at all.

Dealing with Conflict

This could be the last situation Managers would like to touch. 2 staffs keep complaining each other to your face, and both are right-hand men to you that you wish them can cooperate well together. However, they all want to win your support and you're under big pressure to take side.

I had a situation back 8 years ago in a small office. 2 of best staffs kept knocking my door, one after the other in a week, complaining each other. They were all devoted to this company by doing their job - one covered operation with full of process and regulation, and the other handled marketing, who required a bit flexibility to deal with dynamic marketing issues. Initially I only tried to comfort them by helping them see the other's good side, and of course it didn't work at all, and then realized I needed to pay more attention with more coach skills.

To deal with the situation, below conversation might help a bit:

"George, Both of you are my best team members. I need you two to cowork together, which is very important to our team. Would you like to try?" (State your expectation clearly and stay away from finding the causes or what happened, that will only make things worse.)

"If you two did put effort and co-work well, what do you think I might see the difference?" (Use "what if dreams come true" skill to sketch the beautiful future after the effort.)
"We will report to you our current working status and bother you less."

"Great! Then, what you might have done to make Mary feel you're willing to cowork with her?" (Use "Simon says" to simulate how the other party sees her change.)

"Well... I might go to her office personally to ask for her opinion on the topic before the group meeting..." (Coachee is always the "expert" to his problem.)

"Sounds good. What would you see her reaction while she saw you come to her office with smile?"
"I think she will listen calmly and smile back." ("Dreams come true" skill)

"Does that make you feel good?" "Yeah...I think."

"From 1-10 to describe your relationship, what will you score current situation and what will be after you'd done that?" (Scaling skill to make things measurable and see the progress step by step.)

"Current situation is about 2, and after that may increase to 5.

"Perfect! so what do you plan to do before our next conversation?".....(Actions before closing)

In my situation, things didn't work out as smooth. Their relationship is fragile that I had to pay more attention on their moves to make positive impression to the other. Trust and respect have to be built with their every small step.

One more tip that you may consider to assign them another easier job they have to work together to get it done in short time.

PS. Some told me "coaching" thing is not suitable to oriental world. Harsh and disciplinary management style is most effective. Just told them what to do accurately and don't waste time on this "psychology" thing.
I don't see conflict here and I'd like to elaborate more on management style in my next post.